Hi guys,
I was wondering on what your thoughts were on the new layout? I know I keep changing it but I get bored really easily so I like to keep things moving. Can you guys still read everything? Is there a problem that I maybe haven't encountered yet? Let me know and I will see what I can do to the extent of my minor computer programming skills. I am learning though for which you all can thank Alex.
Speaking of Alex, yesterday was his birthday. A few other people and I planned a surprise 24th birthday party for him and it was amazing and a ton of fun and partied at a friends place. Alex and I went out tonight (its Saturday night/Sunday morning at the moment when I'm writing this) just the two of us to celebrate. Just after we finished dinner and were waiting for dessert, Alex said he had a present for me. I ofcourse said its your birthday I should be the one giving him a present. He just laughed and handed me a tiny box. As you can guess my first thought was its a ring. Then the second was oh crap I can't do that. I'm only 20 amoung other thoughts. After Alex told me four or five times to open it I picked it up noticed my hands were shaking.
When I opened it, I saw a ring. I don't know what my intial reaction was. One part of my brain was screaming "hell yes' and the other was screaming "hell no". I looked at Alex and then he said posiibly one of the sweetest things in the world. He said to no panic because it wasn't a engagement ring because he knew we were both way to young and of the wrong culture/heritage to do that. Instead he said that it was a promise ring of sorts. I know how cheesy and high school promise rings sound but it really wasn't cheesy at all. He said that since he was going to be gone for 7 months he wanted to give me something to remember him by everyday so he got the ring for me.After his explanation I could breathe again and he slipped it onto my finger.
I found the ring on the internet since he got it at Zales and it was easy to find on thier website. The link is http://www.zales.com/product/index.jsp?productId=3299527
if any of you are curious and want to see. I LOVE it. I never thought I would be the hearts/diamonds kind of girl but I keep catching myself staring at it and thinking how pretty it is. Alex knew me better than I did i guess, lol.
I don't know if I've mentioned it (probably didn't because I'm still a little in denial) but Alex is going to be doing an international internship in Spain starting in July and he'll be back in February 2011. Its a long time away but its also a amazing opportunity for him and I'm happy for him but I'm sad as you can understand.
The sleep that wasn't coming when I started to write this is here now so I"m going to head to bed before I fall asleep on my laptop.
~Rory
The story of a 21 year old college student in the midst of balancing between two worlds. The amazing culture and traditions of India and the moderness of her world in America.
So you can't marry Alex even if you guys are in love??
ReplyDeleteThat right and wrong at the same time. Since Alex and I are off the same culture, part of India and caste we can marry, theoretically. Since both of our parents, especially mine, are super traditional and don't believe in so called "love marriages" its not a option for us to just go up to them and say we are getting married, like a normal American couple could.
ReplyDeleteThat's not to say that Alex and I can never get married. There is a good posibility that a match between is will be at the very least discussed. But it would all happen in a very traditional way. Someone in our families or friends would bring it up and then both families would decide if we suit eachother or not.
Since my parents and Alex's parents have been friends since before Alex and I were born and Alex and I have been friends since I was 9, a "arranged" marriage is a possibility.
I know for a fact that my dad and his dad have talked about it before because I've walked in on them talking about it.
Now if my parents found out that I've been dating Alex on and off for about 3 years now, they would kill. I wouldn't be allowed out of their eyesight and would have no say in anything that regards my life.
I hope that lengthy explanation makes sense. If you have more questions let me know. And as for the ring, I don't know how I'm going to explain that to my parents.
I'm really surprised beyond words. Your parents should think about your happiness, not what culture/traditions dictate. Don't get me wrong, I'm myself of Indian descent. My family is extremely orthodox (we're Brahmins), but my parents have always thought "outside the box" for us, their priority is our well-being... I've experienced all the restrictions you write about, bu still, we do have a say in whom we want to marry ...
ReplyDeleteI thought from your name that you were probably Indian. I don't think I made myself clear though. I will have a say in who I marry. That means that I have veto power but then so do my parents. For example if I like/love a guy but they don't they can say no. But if they like a guy and I don't, I can say no as well.
ReplyDeleteThe only way that I won't have any say on who I marry is if my parents find out that I am dating. Dating is a big thing is Indian culture but especially in my family.
Kajol as you know issat or respect is huge and my parents mentality is that if there friends find out that their daughter (me) is dating, they will lose respect for my parents. Which is a little rediculas because I know that most of my parents kids date because I am friends with them.
I'm inpatiently waiting for another post. I'm addicted :) Not trying to be a mean comment, don't take it that way, just ugh, waiting sucks when you want more :)
ReplyDeleteTo start out I'm completely naive about your culture. But, if your parents would have such a difficulty with you and Alex choosing to be together outside of an arrangement are you going to be able to wear the ring around them?
ReplyDeleteAt the moment, no. I have to find a way to explain the presence of the ring and why I'm wearing it. So far I've hidden it from them but I can't do that forever
ReplyDeleteWear it on another finger and say you wanted to get something pretty for yourself. ;)
ReplyDelete